How Saints are choosen

I guess you don’t know the real story about Saint Patrick,(Patty to his friends). One day a long time ago, Patrick Kennedy, great grandfather of John F. Kennedy, was walking along the road. Suddenly a rabbit fell from the sky and landed on his head, the rabbits head and front feet dangling over poor Patrick’s face. (An Eagle had lost his grip and dropped the rabbit). When Patrick pulled the rabbit off his head, the sight of those bloody bunny eyes staring at him sent him into a screaming rage, as he ran down the road, he tripped and banged his head on a tree, sending him into a bog on the side of the road.
A group of passerby’s ran in and pulled Patrick out and tried to revive him. Because of his condition and the lack of Irish doctors, he was sent to England where he was revived.
The doctors asked him what his name was to asertain his condition. Patrick started shouting that he had gotten rid of all of the snakes in Ireland, he waved his arms about repeating the story of how he lead the snakes into the ocean (clearly delusional) .
A few days later, after he had calmed down, one of the doctors took him home. On the way the Dr. noticed that indeed there were no snakes. He stopped and asked a few children if they had seen and snakes, answer, no.
When the doctor returned to England, he related the story to his priest in hopes of an answer to his mystery. Upon hearing the tale, the priest shouted out, It’s a miracle, It’s a miracle (hoping to get some attention for himself and his parish) and relying on the only answer he had been taught by the church. .
The English press caught wind of the story and made a really big deal of it because news was a bit slow. (at the time there were no wars to cover and they never reported on royal indiscretions, clearly Pre Murdock time ).
A select group of Catholic Priests were sent to Ireland to confirm that indeed there were no snakes on the island. Finding none, they confirmed the miracle and made Patrick a Saint.
Of coarse, no one ever asked the Irish about the snakes, if they had, they would have found out that there never were any snakes on the island, but then again, when else would the Irish get the chance to have a Saint of their own, so no one volunteered the information.
End of story.

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